Thanksgiving?

Every year I struggle. Not just with the words, but how to explain to my daughter the intense truthful history of colonization. Thanksgiving feels like such a hoax and I am working to embrace it from a different direction. So far, our approach is to consider it as a way to come together in family,…

Gendered toys

The other day, my partner took our daughter for some fast food. At the drive-thru window, the cashier asked if he wanted the girl toy or the boy toy. From the back, she answered “girl toy.” This is what showed up in her meal. When she opened it, she said “thank goodness I got the…

Batgirl Ariel

Halloween is on its way, which means I have to figure out what to dress my child as. I always ask her and she never knows. This year I tried to get her to pick from a book she has on rebel girls. I thought for sure she’d pick Misty Copeland or Joan Jett. But…

“9, 10, a big fat hen”

My kid loves to sing, any and all songs. The other day I heard “1, 2, buckle my shoe” and I thought this could be an opportunity. The version she knows from school ends with “9, 10, a big fat hen.” This time when she sang it, she laughed and said “fat is a funny…

Finding Humility in Parenting

I was reminded of this instance not long ago and feel it’s an important lesson in humility as a parent. This reminder came because recently my daughter referred to a person as “bigger.” But then she followed with “some people are bigger and some are smaller and that’s ok.” When she was about three years…

Toxic masculinity

As I sit here, I feel incredibly overwhelmed. I am 19 weeks pregnant and now know that the baby has male body parts. This feels foreign to me and incredibly pressure filled. This little person has a good chance of growing up to hold the most privilege in our country. Although, we don’t know their*…

Charlottesville

Today, I spoke to my 4 year old about white supremacy. We’ve talked many times before about how some white people think that they are better than people of color. We have talked about how some people even have hate for people of color. But today, as she scrolled through my facebook feed like a…

Parenting win

A good friend got her a shirt that reads “Puppies, Not Patriarchy.” It was pretty big in size, so it was only the other day that she finally picked it to actually wear. We were getting ready to go to the grocery store. When she showed up in the big shirt, big smile, ready to…

The women’s march in DC

I was so sick and I couldn’t march. I had planned on going, and taking her with me. I thought, “she needs to start learning about being out in the streets to fight for our rights, to fight for change.” But I was too sick. Instead, we sat at home while I nursed a terrible…

The day after the election

The night of the election, she went to vote with me. I had already explained the urgency of this election and the fears I had of the outcome. I wanted her to vote with me, in case we made history that night. Leaving the voting booth, she turned to her Dad and said, “Daddy, we…